I'm sooooo stressed =(

Before this past month, I was unemployed for 7 months. It was hard and took a toll on a lot of things and people in my life. As soon as I got a new job everyone, including myself, felt a tremendous amount of relief. This job by the way is at a well known restaurant where truckers often stop for breakfast or midnight snacks. However, ours isn't really in a great location for truckers so it's really just locals and people who are hungry during late hours. At first the job was cool. I liked the people and I liked the hours I was getting. Unfortunately that's changed very quick. I'm young and usually it's older women and men who work in this particular restaurant, but at the store I work at there's a lot of younger people.(Still a fair share of older people, though)

Anyway, at first I got along great with everyone and I still do in a way but I no longer feel like I fit in with their personalities after getting to know them better. I'm not shy person per-say, but I am quiet and I like to do my work and get it done so that I can go home at a decent time. The girls and guys I work with it seems are totally different. I like to laugh and cut up just as much as the next person but I'm not really into sexual-based jokes or hearing about how you sucked the fry cooks d***, everything about his personal life, and then watching the pregnant waitress and another fry cook flirt relentlessly because of a past fling. This is a job for me, not a way to hook up with someone(I already have a boyfriend anyway) or buy pills from someone. (The pregnant waitress sells pills as well) Not to mention more than one of my co-workers are drunk and/or high during their shifts.

On top of that my hours have gotten totally out of hand. There are quite a few people there who manage to pull double shifts however the money isn't that great and it's more work than it's worth. The shifts are normally 7 hours unless you're working overnight which at that point it becomes 10. So, my schedule which is usually 2pm-9pm is TOTALLY out of whack now. I work 9pm-7am tonight, 5pm-9pm tomorrow,(not bad) 2pm-9pm monday, off tues, 2-9pm wed, 9pm-7am thurs, 2pm-9pm fri, and 5pm-7am sat.

What the h***?! It starts out somewhat normal but they want me to work until 7am one day and then come back in at 2pm the very same day. Then the next day they want me to work 14 hours straight. It MIGHT be doable IF I knew I were entitled to some sort of break or lunch. However, we only get to rest when everything is clean and done and that's uh... Never. I NEVER get to eat anything at my job because there's simply no time until my shift is over and at that point I'm SO tired I just want to leave. The tips are horrible, and I'm a good waitress I always try to be courteous and get everything right, make sure everything is refilled and cooked properly. This seems to go unnoticed 9 out of 10 times. People in my town are entirely too f****** cheap.

I thought this job would be a blessing and it's turning out to be a curse. I feel depressed because I work so very hard and show up on time and even stay late to get things done for practically nothing at all.

I also have a tumor on my ankle which causes me a lot pain after standing on it for too long, so obviously a 14 hour shift is pretty much out of the question. I never get to spend time with my boyfriend anymore which greatly adds to my already growing depression because other than the few family members I have near me whom I never get to see, he's all I have and he's all I care about. =(

I realize there are many people who would kill to have a job in this economy and to be honest? I'd almost be THRILLED to give them mine at this point and it's hardly been a month.

I need the money so I obviously have to keep working and I can't complain too much about my hours otherwise I might not get any at all. I just can't win either way and it's taking a toll on me mentally and physically. I'm tired ALL the time because I have no set hours or off days. The schedule changes almost daily and each time it does, it gets worse. I feel uncomfortable with the people I work with, and the customers. Some of them are so nasty and perverted. I just don't know what to do. I'm still looking for another job but I'm fearful it will just take months on end like it did for me to find this one. =(

I literally can't take anymore of it, I feel like no amount of sleep is enough and my ankle where my tumor is constantly hurting and causing me grief. The time goes by so much slower when you're in pain. I'm trying to get it taken care of but it's hard when you have little money and work ALL the time. =( I just can't take the stress anymore..

Jul 21, 2012

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