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Does anyone feel the same ?

I admit it sometimes I ** and thinking little boys but I get ** with adults.
I see children only emotionally .
I think I could fall in love with an innocent and handsome little boy but not sexually , the same with an adult .
These feelings for children came to me suddenly at my 22 years old .
Now I am 23 and I think these feelings came cause I want so much to be a child again .
I like to watch movies and series with children , I like to listen opera from little boys in church and in general I like to listen them singing , l like to hear their high sweet voice , I like to hear stories about children and I like stories that shows the power of children , I like their innocence on ** .
I like everything that is childish , fairytales , childish movies , candy , cartoons , playground , trabolin and other stuff that are childish .
I would like my body was like when I was little girl , without chest , without hair on my body , more white skin with more cuteness on my face and more happiness in my soul .
Then I was for more comfortable than now in everything .
I am getting sad when I think that everyone including myself is growing up.
I would like it if we were all children forever , I am depressed because I want to be a kid again .
When i was 18 years old i was talking on facebook with a 12 year old boy and we were talking so nice about everything .
We saw only once each other in person when i was 20 and him 14 .
His mother was there with us too .
I start to feel emotionally connected with him .
It was so cute until when he became 15 and me 21 his mother didnt want her son talk to me anymore and now he doesnt like me and block me in every account i tried to connect with him .
He said that he felt empty without me and that i was his best friend and now i suddenly dont matter to him ?
I was sad and angry at the same time because when i told him that i feel close to him and i like to talk to him i meant it .
I have not spoke with him until 24 April 2016 .
Feeling this way can be difficult .
It's difficult cause I feel inferior from other adults .
I am childish I know maybe it's not normal cause I must behave like an adult .
I miss the innocence of children , this is what I like so much about them .
I would like to see the world from a child's eyes .
I would like an adult to take care of me .
And if I knew a preteen boy has this need too I would like to help him .
If I met an childish adult with childish soul and look like myself I would liked it.
If I was not depressed and was happy inside i would easily imagine myself play with children , listening childish music together . going to a childish theatre together .
Dont go your mind somewhere vulgarity , i want to be with children as friends .
But i found out that children now days starting behave like they are older their age .
God this is repel me so much !
I feel more ''child'' that children now days .
Little girls want to grow up fast and become women and little boys want to grow up fast and become men .
Though they should be happy for being kids and so beautiful like angels and play and run happily in playgrounds and watch cartoons with an innocence in their soul .
Once a 9 year old boy when i put him to listen a childish music or watch cartoons told me ''these is for babies'' , can you believe this ? a 9 year old told this to me .
Sometimes i want to save these children , to protect them and make them children again cause i feel like a child but with more rights than the ''real biological'' children .

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  • My sweet angel you must speak to someone about this . This is violence . And you don't deserve it . Honey really talk to someone . You have the right to go to the police . It's cruel that they do to you these stuff . At least now you are in bed with your teddy sweetie . If you make you feel better my sweet I have depressed mood too . And I cry right now too . I am glad that we talk ! And I like that you open your little heart to me but please find someone that you can talk . Is there any logical person around you ? I wonder why others don't do anything when they see your mother smack you ? And you told me that pastor hit you on the ** and you were naked . Honey this is can be sexual assault because he has no right to even touch you there . Please find someone logical and kind that you can talk to and that can help you .

  • At least Is the police good in your country ?

  • What they do to you is not compliance is violence sweetie .

  • I love you mommy and only want too talk too you mommy and no one else. Your my real mommy now and i love you allways mommy and your nicest mommy in world xxxxxx

  • Hugs my sweetie ! I love you too ?

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  • I just talk too you mommy and thats all i want and i was not all naked mommy because i had my pj top on and their right mommy i keep say sorry and messing up mommy. I love you mommy and now im sad your sad mommy and hope i did not make you sad because now your my real mommy. Its stinging me mommy and im sorry. Love your angel baby girl mommy xxxxxx

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