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I binge at night. When my family is asleep I come downstairs and I eat. I eat as much as I can. I stuff myself like a pig and it's why I'm fat. It's why my face is round and I have a double chin. It's why I can't fit into normal sized clothes or chairs with arms. Its why I can't run or go up a flight of steps without breaking into a sweat. I binge and it feels so good and it's destroying my body. Sometimes when I find a new stretch mark or outgrow another pair of pants I feel ashamed and I'll want to punish myself for being such a gross fat pig, so I'll eat even more until it hurts. I feel out of control and scared. I repulse myself and feel turned on all at the same time. I hate this about me but I don't want to stop. I want to see how far I will go. How out of control will I get? How fat? How unhealthy? I think I need help, but I want to know what will happen if I don't get it. I'm honestly terrified that I feel this way because I'm doing it. Every night I'm doing it to myself. I'm gorging on junk and watching it manifest itself all over my big heavy growing body. I'm actively ruining my body. Internally with massive doses of fat sugar and salt. I can feel my health slipping away, but what excites me is the visual manifestation of that. I can see the damage I'm doing. The shameful excessive gluttony is visible and obvious and getting worse every day. I barely recognize myself in the mirror. Who is this fat disgusting blob? I've changed so much. Grown so much. My features distorted by fat. My limbs thick and heavy to lift, my hips wide, my waist gone - overwhelmed with flab that forms tire-like rolls that hug me and hang down to my cellulite covered thighs. I'm grotesque. Obese. That is what I did. That is me and more and more it is all I am as i slip deeper and deeper into this morbid endeavor. There is so much of me now and I am almost gone.
You're getting so lovely & fat. My wife says it is extremely pleasurable being hugely fat, she has gotten even fatter since I last posted. She absolutely loves how soft & how heavy she is.
Do you know how much she weighs now? Has she noticed any changes with her recent gains? The other poster above has me thinking ahead to what it's going to be like when I pass 600.
She had a check-up, which is a story in itself. She weighed in at 786lbs & as we sat alone, she felt my **, I was hard & she said "Turned on by what I weigh? I am". I put my hand on her enormous belly & told her I was. She said she was so turned by what she weighed.
Has she changes with her recent gains? We both have. She has just bigger all over. Her belly is bigger, rounder, hangs below her knee's, it looks so heavy swinging pendulously with each step. Her ** is massive, with a huge shelf between her back & rolls more than ever with her belly swing. Her ** are bigger, stretch marked & must be 10lbs each, pushed to each side by her belly. Her head sits on a big roll of single chin fat. She waddles with her legs spread as her thighs are so much fatter, no knee's at all, buried in beautiful fat. No ankles, but a nice roll of fat where they meet her feet. She is really struggling to waddle around weighing so much. A few steps & she's puffing wildly, leans on one of the many rails, which makes her look even fatter, till she catches her breath, then a few more steps & she's puffing again. "So....fat....so heavy". But on our way home, she admitted that she had become a feedee & wanted me to be her feeder & fatten her more, a lot more. Like you & the over 800lb woman that posted here, it wasn't just a want to gain more, she needed to put on more weight. She is addicted to seeing herself getting fatter, it is so ** to her & needs to put on a lot more weight. Her own huge body makes her **, especially when stuffing herself with huge amounts food & thinks of nothing but the lbs it's adding & more soft, sensuous fat.
Oh yes, she had a check-up & weighed 784lbs! When we were alone after weighing her, we both admitted that it turned us both on. She put her hand on my **, feeling how hard I was. "I love my being so fat turns you on so much".
Changes? Yes. She says how she's just gotten bigger all over. Her thighs so big she waddles with them spread, no knee's at all, just fat, no ankles with a roll of fat above her feet. Arms are bigger, elbows buried in fat. No neck, just a big single chin roll, ** huge, fat filled, stretch marked, the size of 1/2 a melon & pushed to the side by her enormously, big round belly. She is having more difficulty carrying so much weight. She only takes a few steps & she puffing, she'll lean on one of the many rails to catch her breath & then a few more steps. It actually turns us both on. Each step, her belly swings pendulously, looking so heavy, lower belly lifts by each thigh, her arms out at an angle due to her girth. Massive **, rolling from side to side. All as she takes deep, breaths & makes deep puffing noises. She'll say "God....I'm....so...fat" & smile at me. I could tell you so much more.
Yes, we know what she weighs, she had a check-up. We found her weight so **, for her to weigh 784lbs. Has noticed changes? Oh yes. She's over a 100lbs heavier than when we last weighed her. She says how she's so much bigger, gotten so much fatter & feels so heavy, even how the floor creaks more under her weight. She's fatter in the face, no neck, just fat, her ** are so fat filled, stretch marked & the size of 1/2 a melon. They are pushed to the side by her enormously fat laiden belly. It is of dynamic proportions, hanging past her knee's, yet only a double belly, big round upper belly, then from where her breast bone ends, this huge, round lower belly, with a cavernous belly button. This forces her hugely fat arms out at an angle, as they rest at her sides. Her thighs, so big, she waddles with them spread. She's just so much fatter. She is really having issues carrying herself around now. Her belly swings, pendulously, ** rolls from side to side, her whole body, wobbles slowly & heavily. A few steps & she's grunting, "oommph" as she fills her cheeks & blows it out, has to rest before a few more steps. She'll smile & wink at me. "Oh babe....I'm so....fat". But after the check-up she told me that she has totally become a feedee, not just wanting to gain, but needs & is driven to put on more weight & wants me to feed & fatten her. We've had quite a few feeding session's & god it is so **, she runs one hand over her belly, pulls on me with the other, as I run one hand over her belly & feed her with the other. The whole time there's fattening talk. "That's it babe, feed me, don't stop". I'll say. "Oh darlin, that's it, eat & eat & eat". It always ends with **. Again the fat talk drives me wild, what she says, I can't stop fattening her now & that's what she wants. "Imagine me 200lbs heavier".
Yes, she had a check up & weighs 784lbs!
Changes? How much bigger she has gotten, feels so much heavier & all the affects of that. Fatter in the face, no neck just one huge double chin, ** stretch marked, bigger & pushed to the side by her enormous belly. No elbows, knees or ankles, they all all covered in fat. She gets out of breath now much quicker trying get up, adjusting herself when sitting & especially waddling. We both admitted how much it turned us on to see her being weighed & that figure of 784lbs. She wants to gain more.