My ex-fiancé loved hearing stories about my college F-buddy

I was F-buddies with a black basketball player in college. According to the athletic program, AJ - central FL, 6’10” & 205 lbs. I’m from rural OH, red hair, green eyes, 4’11 & 108 lbs. I was a junior with SWF status when my sorority hosted a celebration party after the basketball team scored a big upset win over our rival. AJ was a senior that got his first start because the team captain had a season ending injury during the game prior. I already had a few hits from a joint when AJ came over to talk. He’s tall, ripped, rock hard and muscular! He was smooth with his approach and direct with his intentions ‘wanna go f**k’. Sorry, that works. We left for his room.
It’s not proper to kiss and tell but I quickly discovered AJ’s HUGE! He could tell by my reaction I was a little concerned. I was relaxed and aroused but still didn’t want to get ripped in half. He said, ‘I wanna eat fresh white girl p**y first’. OMG! BEST EVER! When he finished, I was breathless as he squirted me full of warming lube. I tried giving him oral (I know I’m not good). He was super cool and poured lube on it and told me to I use my hands. It took both to rub him hard. Neither of us had a condom but I didn’t care at the moment! He got on top & started out slow. I really thought it’d hurt but it didn’t because it was so slippery. He went in with ease then picked up a nice rhythm. It felt like a large long sponge being pushed inside and expanding once inside :) His rhythm and being stretched to the max was driving me crazy! I have pale skin so I felt my neck and face flush when I got off. He laughed then creamed me full.
He’d text me for s** often and we hooked up many times. BC didn’t work and I had to visit planned parenthood once. I wasn’t obligated & didn’t need his ‘permission’ because it’s my body but I told AJ about the procedure. I merely thought it was worth mentioning so he’d know about my two week recovery period. He was supportive and happy with my decision. We were just too young to deal with that hassle. It was the right decision and I’m glad it didn’t change anything between us. He was willing to still hook up with me after I recovered. AJ moved away after school but we remained friends on fb.
I’m pursuing my masters in creative writing and became engaged to a guy back home. To answer the obvious question, yes, he’s white.
In late May, AJ posted a George Floyd memorial to sign and a BLM link to my fb page. My fiancé took notice and this opened the door for good conversation. I shouldn’t have but at first I was embarrassed and uncomfortable to talk about having a sexual relationship with a black guy. I was glad to be part of this conversation. It opened my eyes for me to realize I’m white privileged and part of the problem. AJ’s a person of color, we were two adults having consensual casual s**. Now, I’m not ashamed to say AJ is part of my past just like any other guy I’d been with. It’s part of who I am.
I didn’t know what reaction I’d get. He was curious, asked for details and wanted me to show him how big his p**** was. I told him a lot and about the abortion. In a weird way, he seemed turned on and asked if we’d ever videoed. AJ did many times during oral so he could share with his teammates but I never agreed during intercourse. I freaked out when he asked to watch one. I told him AJ would airdrop them but I’d just delete them. Why would I want to keep a vid like that? He asked me to message AJ to send one. We had a fight because this got weird. I wanted to move on with my life and now having doubts about my the guy I’m engaged too.
Without permission, my fiancé ghost messaged AJ from my phone. Thankfully, I caught it time. Wouldn’t that be awkward? Hey, AJ can you re-send vid of me giving you oral? Oh, btw my fiancé wants to see it….. WTF and NO!
Thankfully, the conversation was “How are you?” “What are you up to these days” We caught up and started messaging. WTF, my fiancé encouraged me to continue chatting with him.
In June, AJ invited me to a BLM rally with him in Lexington (2.5 hrs away). I said ‘sure’. He sent me the details then asked, “dtf after?” I showed my fiancé his message and said “THERE! IS THAT WHAT YOU WANTED?” He got excited and told me to do it and try to video it. I gave him his ring back and broke things off. I met up with AJ at the rally. We didn’t get to have s** because things got crazy. Long story but we did what needed to be done but I got detained for being out of state and ‘associated’ with a group damaging buildings. LOL I got released at 6am. The POS officer ‘advised’ me to behave during the rest of my stay in KY.
That’s my confession. I started out as a SWF and currently a SWF.

Nov 2, 2020

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