I'm terrified of dying

I'm absolutely terrified of dying. I mean, so terrified that whenever I even let myself consider the idea, I get sick to my stomach for hours, and feel such a feeling of dread that I can't even describe it. Sometimes I wish I believed in God, because it's not the idea of being dead that scares me; it's the idea of being OVER. If I believed that there was something after this, maybe I wouldn't be so afraid. It freaks me out, thinking that when this life is over, there's nothing more, this is all I'll ever be. I feel like I've already wasted so much time and screwed up way too much, if this is the only time I'm going to get, and it absolutely terrifies me. But I can't believe in God; I try, but I just can't. Every ounce of logic in me tells me that God is what people need to believe in to keep from being either as terrified as I am all the time, or, worse, being entirely without conscience since nothing they did would ultimately matter. The concept of God makes no logical sense, and I can't do like people have told me and just push logic aside. My brain doesn't work that way. When I try, I just keep coming back to the point that religion of some sort, a higher power to answer to, for at least the majority of the population is basically a necessity in a society such as ours, and the concept was created out of need for self-regulation and justification. But despite not being able to believe it, I WISH I did. I'm jealous of the people who do believe because they aren't afraid to die. They 'know' they have something better waiting for them, and even if that turns out to not be true, they still are living their current life without the fear I have of not existing anymore after I die. The fear of being entirely inconsequential and insignificant.

So... I guess my secret is that even though I don't believe in God, I desperately wish that I did, and that while I'm generally politely tolerant of religion while still feeling a certain amount of incredulity that people practice any religion at all, at the same time I am kind of jealous of their ability to believe. I don't know what to do, and I'm so, so tired of dreading death so much that it affects my ability to live my life fully.

Aug 7, 2010

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  • One thing that atheists always get wrong is facts over choose. What you need to know is that having faith in a religion or belief system is a choice. We don't believe in it because we were able to prove it and so know as true like you know the world is round. We HOPE our religion is true and we choose to believe in our faith and strive to live our lives accordingly. Eventually the comfort seeps in and warmth, happiness and calm fills your soul and comforts you when life sucks or nears it's end.

    Before I retired from health care I've watched many people die. You can clearly tell the difference between the ones knowing that they are about to see long lost family and God versus the others that scream out of fear or anger and beg for more time as the slip away, FREAKED out.

    Do what you have to, to find inner peace and solace. Why let yourself die while freaking out?

  • Don't fall into nihilism so early. For me it seems incorrect to conclude there is no consciousness life after death as we haven't been able to conclude how we are conscious at all. From my perspective we shouldn't be experiencing qualia at all we should all be nuroneurological zombies http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Philosophical_zombie . Just machines running around that look act and declare they are conscious but not actually experiencing Qualia. If you believe everything about counscious thought is Physical and nothing more then you like wise don't believe in free will but it sure feels like we are makeing decisions all the time. All this uncertainty has made me open to the posibility for a soul, god etc. There's too much uncertainty to just conclude the physical mind is the only mind.

  • Religion is not the answer, a personal relationship with Jesus is. Jesus say, "Jesus if your real, I want to know you." Do this everyday and don't give up until you get a response. Be sincere, some people do this not really wanting a response, but just to say they did it and it didn't work for them.

  • I don't know about wishing Christ a nice day, but access to (as in communication with) Him is absolutely available to you. If this fear has you so anxious that it's driven you to cry anonymously for help, then why not give Christianity all of your effort? What have you got to lose? What have you got to gain? I'm no master of logic, by any means, but I know that death is not the end for me because I feel it. I've just recently become a Christian, and before that I suppose I was agnostic. I prayed nearly every night to God, and still somehow felt alone. Christianity is not a religion, it's a relationship. I love God because I've sensed His love for me. If you still can't quite wrap your head around this, then this website will help you: http://www.proofthatgodexists.org/

  • The fear you're experiencing is not uncommon.

    I'm 43 years old, and lost my dad 8 years ago. He was 61. I've lost a couple grandparents and uncles, but also have many extended family members who are into their 70s and 80s including my grandmother who is 99. I will have to deal with the topic in the next 10-20 years no doubt.

    Here is a good article on the topic:

    I get that feeling every once in a while, sometimes waking up in the morning or going to sleep at night. Like, what the ---- happens. What am I aware of?

    I'm Roman Catholic, so I have my religious beliefs. But still physically and observationally what happens? I wonder about that. I get you're question, but I can't answer.

    I always use a quote from my dad. "The sun will always come up tomorrow. If it doesn't, we all have a lot more to deal with than how bad the traffic is."

    So following from that I guess my advice would be, try not to obsess about it, but if you get into a health situation where you know things are headed in a bad way, make sure you're family, friends, you're favorite charities, whomever are taken care of.

    No idea how old you are, and its a tough topic. But try not to obsess and do what you can to make those around you happy. Even in small ways. By doing that, you'll be surprised about the happiness you bring to yourself.

    Just my $0.20. BC

  • I mean this with all my heart; its worked for me and I know its worked with others. The next time you're alone in a private place, call out to Jesus (Christ of Nazareth). Ask Him if He is real, and if He's the son of God the Father. Tell Him your common sense is telling you :"No", and ask Him to correct you if you're wrong. Tell Him he appeared to Thomas (the doubting follower of Him) who asked to see Him after His resurrection, and would He please do the same for you. Say "thank you" (as you would to any other person) wish Him a nice day (as you would to any other person) then be open to a response. He might answer in dreams, visions, people coming up to you all of a sudden and giving you their testimonies, or, He might appear to you in person (as He did to me). Judging from your confession, I would say He has been trying to get your attention. Would it be fair to say that He has achieved that? lol After He has manifested Himself to you, don't forget to find a Bible-believing Church that recognizes Him as Savior and Lord. THis is extremely important. I think that one of the many ministries in the country (For example, the 700 club, Jack Hayford (Church on the Way), In Touch Ministries, Charles Stanley etc etc) would be happy to direct you to one. Ask them also to warn you about cults that profess to be followers of Christ but are not. If I can be of any further assistance, please post again and let me know how I can get in touch with you! God richly bless you, and I know you will get your answer. Love Dave

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