Spirituality is brutal
We met almost a year ago,
I was at a point in my life where I was kindof lost
And you helped me,...well sortof.
You claimed to be my spiritual guide,
Allot of strange things happened to me during this time. Including a near death experience where I crossed over to something and then came back.
To this day I don't really talk about what happened
While all this went on it permenantly changed my life
You exposed me to the collective sub conscious
And you taught me about balance.
You tell me it what you devoted your life to.
And you helped me to understand it all.
You told me there would be an event,
Something traumatic would happen and that it was very likely to happen around my 21rst birthday.
You said that I would loose something precious to me
And from there gain a new perspective that it could never be taken again, or at least something of the sort.
You told me that the concept I would learn to feel a greater understanding of was life. Strange how it all unfolded because I found out I was pregnant. I asked what would happen if I kept the baby but we both felt a strong since of something going wrong. I had a dream during this entire thing you left and told me to be careful, that something would happen to you while I was gone. I felt certain if anything happens I would phone you.
Then a figure appeared a white cat but it was a humoid type figure standing over me it wore a deep black cloak that shadowed its face, I can't place the emotion of the energy I felt radiating from it, I wanna say wrath but I know that can't be right (surely it wasn't a human emotion.) It didn't speak but sent a thought through its third eye that traveled to mine saying "You must leave this body now." Unlike my first experience with death I knew what was going on. I tired to move but my entire body locked up my muscles contracted and my vision blurred so I couldn't see the figure clearly. I managed to send a thought back images and reasoning of why I was saying "No I need to stay here." I managed to get the abortion may 5th 2011 after everything here seemed to try and prevent it. 2 days before the state I lived in would no longer allow a termination. And my to my amazement, and horror everything you had said taking place occurred. We completed each task for which the information was given to us the day of. Everything we did was in balance up until it was all over. I try not to think about it all nowadays. The word balance seems to appear everywhere like in conversations with people randomly stuff online and TV radio and other crap, I feel I am closer to it than before. I try to just shrug it off it wouldn’t be the weirdest thing I’ve seen in my life. Maybe soon I'll achieve it and things will become easier for me. But still I look at myself now compared to who I was and don't recognize who I am anymore. You tell me its time to rewrite myself I really hope when I am done with it all I will like who I become.....