Lines Are Getting Blurred Again
I liked him for a year and we eventually got hugely aggressive and frustrated with each other because he didn't like that I wouldn't hear 'no' and I didn't care anymore. This year we're better, but we're both really cuddly. He's slept in my bed two or three times and we've shared a couch before. We were with some friends tonight and we played the awkward game. We both knew what lines not to cross so playing got more and more difficult. He kissed my neck from collar to ear and ran his tongue along my collarbone. I undid his pants for him and gave him a lap dance.
We've established that he doesn't like me and I get that. I still like him and am constantly reminding myself that he is not interested. But I watched his pupils dilate and I can't help but remember the feeling of his mouth and the stubble of his chin going up my neck. Lines are getting blurred. I know that he doesn't like me and it was just a contest to see who would get uncomfortable faster, but I still can feel myself wonder if he likes me.
This is enormously frustrating.