What makes me sickest of all
I wonder if you read this site. I sent you something about it once but you never told me if you looked at it. Still, I found a few confessions here remind me of what you might say or think.
Well anyways I hope if you do check out this site, you read this and you know it's from me.
I think the one thing that bothers me most of all about you, about how we were, and about how things are now...is how you CHOSE and CHOOSE to BULLSHIT me. ME. ME of all f****** people !!!!!! Oh, how you used to tell me how much you hate how the world runs on bullshit. How that's all people do to one another. How no one is truthful. How people only say nice things to get what they want out of you.
I know I wasn't exactly a poster child for living truthfully. But I NEVER f****** bullshitted YOU. I always told you like it is...in the kindest ways possible, if I could. And still, for the longest time, you thought I was a liar and only buttering you up.
But then before you went away, when you started to hide from me.....you began to bullshit me about what was really going on...with you, with us, with your life. You told me everything was fine when it wasn't. How do I know this? Because then one day, when things were supposed to be "fine" then you told me your feelings for me had changed and we were through.
And every day since has been evidence about how you don't miss me at all. After supposedly caring about me. Wanting me.
And now, you barely come around to say hello and it is always because of how "busy" you are. And I'm supposed to believe that.
Yeah, I guess it is the bullshit you've been feeding me for months now that I hate the most. Oh how I want to call you out on it. Crush your whole f****** world with my words. Point out what a hypocrite you've become and a traitor to yourself and what you claim to stand for. And how instead of preventing hurt in me by your deception, it all stabbed me in the heart anyways.
But I don't do it because I actually did care about you. I had your back and I was a friend to you. But are YOU my friend now?
I wouldn't treat you like trash on the curb of your life, like you did me.