I had an affair
I had an affair. I am in a sexless marriage and i answered an ad in craigslist by a man in my same situation. I met him and we had s** in a hotel room. Im freaking out at how dangerous that was. thankfully he was nice and not a serial killer! we texted and emailed daily after that. we met a few days later just for lunch and he told me he has strong feelings for me. we had s** again the next day and he told me he thinks he loves me. I loved how i felt when i was with him....i really like him a lot - hes a sweet person, but i dont love him. i wasnt ready to lose what we had, but i dont love him.
He told his wife about us. She begged him to give their marriage another try so we broke it off.
I felt like id dodged a bullet in a way, but i really did miss being held, i missed the s**, i missed him.
9 days later he texted me telling me he missed me and couldnt stand being without me. I should have just not answered but i was lonely. i called him and we talked for hours. we started texting back and forth again. i went to see him after work the next day and we made out in his car. we had plans to both take a day off of work and get a room as soon as we could arrange it.
the next day his wife emailed me. she confronted me angrily and threatened to sue me for alienation of affection and to confront my husband.
my lover begged me to just go ahead and tell my husband and leave for him. i couldnt. I was not ready to throw everything away for this man. I didnt love him...I mean, I did love him in a way...just not enough to leave everything and move in with him.
And i began to feel so guilty for the hurt i was causing his wife...i felt guilty that he loved me more than i loved him....i just felt horrible.
i emailed her back apologizing for the whole thing. She called me again and we talked....and talked...she told me how he does this regularly. How she has to monitor his computer and phone because he is a p*** addict and often has affairs. But I that I was the first one he ever wanted to leave for. she and i ended up actually liking each other. She said she forgave me. She has emailed me 3 times since then. Its just crazy, how can this woman want to be my friend? how can i actually be considering a friendship with her?