Account Login
Does anyone feel the same ?
I admit it sometimes I ** and thinking little boys but I get ** with adults.
I see children only emotionally .
I think I could fall in love with an innocent and handsome little boy but not sexually , the same with an adult .
These feelings for children came to me suddenly at my 22 years old .
Now I am 23 and I think these feelings came cause I want so much to be a child again .
I like to watch movies and series with children , I like to listen opera from little boys in church and in general I like to listen them singing , l like to hear their high sweet voice , I like to hear stories about children and I like stories that shows the power of children , I like their innocence on ** .
I like everything that is childish , fairytales , childish movies , candy , cartoons , playground , trabolin and other stuff that are childish .
I would like my body was like when I was little girl , without chest , without hair on my body , more white skin with more cuteness on my face and more happiness in my soul .
Then I was for more comfortable than now in everything .
I am getting sad when I think that everyone including myself is growing up.
I would like it if we were all children forever , I am depressed because I want to be a kid again .
When i was 18 years old i was talking on facebook with a 12 year old boy and we were talking so nice about everything .
We saw only once each other in person when i was 20 and him 14 .
His mother was there with us too .
I start to feel emotionally connected with him .
It was so cute until when he became 15 and me 21 his mother didnt want her son talk to me anymore and now he doesnt like me and block me in every account i tried to connect with him .
He said that he felt empty without me and that i was his best friend and now i suddenly dont matter to him ?
I was sad and angry at the same time because when i told him that i feel close to him and i like to talk to him i meant it .
I have not spoke with him until 24 April 2016 .
Feeling this way can be difficult .
It's difficult cause I feel inferior from other adults .
I am childish I know maybe it's not normal cause I must behave like an adult .
I miss the innocence of children , this is what I like so much about them .
I would like to see the world from a child's eyes .
I would like an adult to take care of me .
And if I knew a preteen boy has this need too I would like to help him .
If I met an childish adult with childish soul and look like myself I would liked it.
If I was not depressed and was happy inside i would easily imagine myself play with children , listening childish music together . going to a childish theatre together .
Dont go your mind somewhere vulgarity , i want to be with children as friends .
But i found out that children now days starting behave like they are older their age .
God this is repel me so much !
I feel more ''child'' that children now days .
Little girls want to grow up fast and become women and little boys want to grow up fast and become men .
Though they should be happy for being kids and so beautiful like angels and play and run happily in playgrounds and watch cartoons with an innocence in their soul .
Once a 9 year old boy when i put him to listen a childish music or watch cartoons told me ''these is for babies'' , can you believe this ? a 9 year old told this to me .
Sometimes i want to save these children , to protect them and make them children again cause i feel like a child but with more rights than the ''real biological'' children .
Were home mommy and im in my room again and mom said our pastor and wife will be here at 8 and i have too put on my pjs and i said i dont want too talk with him and he has no right to smack me. But mom shouted at me and said too go too my room now and get my pjs on or she smack me again. I hate her mommy and i cant wait too be big and Im never going too talk too her again mommy and i hate every one mommy. But i love my best friend and my uncle and his family and i might be stupit. But i love my teddy also that my daddy got me and i love you the best mommy. Your the kindest and nicest and allways say im an angel and your little girl and make me feel good mommy and you are the best mommy. I love you and hugg you mommy. Your angel girl xxxxxx
Hi my angel , to be completely honest if I were you I would want to be with your dad too . Your mother and pastor and his wife are paranoid people with big psychological problems . Your right that you hate them I would hate them too . Sweetie if you want go to your uncle's house even without telling him . What direction exactly your mother wants you to have ? When this woman would be satisfied with your behavior already ? How she wants you to be ? A person that never feel angry , sad without desires and sexual desire ? They are even worse . I don't like that I told you this my sweet but running away seems good idea to me now . But somewhere that you will be 100% safe with all your biological needs complete . My angel I admire you for your patience . If I were you this situation it would drive me crazy . I love you too my sweet . I wish I could protect you from them . But remember that you can talk to me . Like I am there with you . Hugs !
Hi mommy and it still stings and i hate them. I love you mommy and sorry i fell asseep again mommy. My eyes were realy tired and sore and i did my best too stay awake. I love you the best mommy and i know i would never be able too live with my uncle and his family and thanks for saying im brave and im not. Because i cry all the time and especialy when i get smacked and i was crying when our pastor even gave out and smacked me. They said im a brat and selfish like mom says mommy and because mom told them i wanted too go to my dad and they said its selfish. But i dont care mommy and think its better i be with my daddy soon. I hate them all so much mommy and thanks for saying all the nicest things about me and would want too cuddle me and let me put my head on you. I watch films and it looks nice when moms hold their kids like that. Im sorry mommy and im crying because your so kind and remember mommy i mean it you could have all my money and i realy am good at cleaning. I love you so much mommy. Your angel girl and huggs you mommy xxxxxx
Im sorry mommy and i love you. I know i never be able too live with you or my uncle and his family. But i realy like too think what it be like mommy. I know my uncle likes me mommy but hes got a wife and two girls now and so thats three girls and they could never let me live there mommy. Im so mad and hate people and i dont mean you mommy or my best friend and my uncle and family. I wish i could get them all back mommy for being mean and saying horribale things too me and smacking me. Im looking at my daddys photo mommy and i have my teddy and dont care if mom sees me and says its stupid or silly xxxxxx
Im sorry mommy xxxxxx
Im sorry mommy and you even said it. I be better with my daddy and i knew it mommy. Im going too do it mommy and it wont matter anymore mommy and no one can say im a brat or selfish or smack me again when i do go too my daddy and no one is stupid youth group can be mean either and especialy the boy i realy liked and i wont care. I love you mommy and thank you. Love your angel girl xxxxxx huggs mommy
Im sorry mommy and i love you. Mom told me too get a shower and dressed were going too visit one off her stupid friends. I hope you dont hate me mommy and think im selfish. Love your angel girl xxxxxx
Hi mommy Im going for my shower and im sorry if i made you mad at me mommy. I love you and its not fair xxxxxx
Were going out mommy and im sorry i made you mad at me and not like me anymore mommy. My mom and every one is right im never go too change and im selfish and a brat and bad influince and im sorry. I love you so much mommy and im sorry. Your angel girl xxxxxx