I want life to be perfect
I have always wanted life to be perfect. I wish it was more like a video game. So when something messes up you can just hit reset and start all over. Yeah I hate it when things don't go as planned. It bothers me so much that lately I hate life altogether. Life sucks. Why do things have to always happen to s**** things up. The list is too long for me to even tell you about. When I was a kid and I got a new toy. If it got a little scratch on it I would get really mad and then I would smash it with a brick or a hammer. Then I just started to put my toys up and not play with them so they wouldn't get messed up. I even have many of them to this day that are as perfect as the day they were made. People are the same way. You meet them and they are perfect. Then they do something to make you mad or not trust them like Lie. So I just stop seeing them or talking with them. I put them on a shelf so to speak. I bought a new pair of pants the other day and this kid at the food court got mustard on them when he put the mustard packet on the floor and stepped on it. The mustard went all over my nice new white designer jeans. I threw them out that night. His mother offered to have them cleaned. I explained that mustard would never come out of them and I just bought them. I told her they are only knew once. At $150.00 I like them when they are nice and new. I told her the thing to do was make sure her child doesn't step on a mustard pack for kicks. People I hate people who do dumb stuff like that. I want my life to be as perfect as possible and I don't appreciate others who mess that up for me. Sometimes I feel like it will never get any better and I should just kill myself and be done with it. But that would leave a mess and not be perfect thing to do. See I don't want to make someone's day not perfect like the police or fire that have to respond to my dead stinking rotting body.