I’m still not sure what to do...

Yesterday I got into a pretty heated argument with my wife. This argument was mainly about our s** life, our intimacy, and just our overall relationship as a whole. My wife has made it clear that she still loves me and is attracted to me but since she gave birth to our son 4 years ago, s** has been at the bottom of her priority list. And for her to say that kinda sucks. To me s** is one of the ways that I feel like I connect deeply with her. Our s** life is pretty sexless. We haven’t had s** in 3 months. I haven’t had a b****** in 2 years. I just don’t know what to do or how our s** life is going to get better. I do think that a lot of the reason why we don’t have s** is bc I don’t sleep in the same bedroom as my wife normally. She sleeps with our kid in our bed and I sleep on the couch in the living room. I have slept consistently with my wife for 3.5 years. I feel like this has a lot do with why we have s**. My wife has expressed me that she has given up on me sleeping in the bed with her and the kid. She said she begged for 2 years for me sleep with her. The reason I started sleeping on the couch originally was because I would snore at night it would wake up the baby so I would go to the couch. Well eventually the snoring stopped but I kept sleeping on the couch consistently. Once I started sleeping on the couch consistently, she wanted me to come back to the bed but I wouldn’t come because I was either tired and enjoyed the convenience of sleeping on the couch or I didn’t fit on the bed because 3 people on a queen is pushin’ it. So she tells me she’s given up on me sleeping with them and to her that is like worst thing. She won’t come out to the living room anymore and have s**. If she does, she is too tired for s** and wants to cuddle. I’m starting to have thoughts of leaving the relationship not just because of the s**, but because I’m just tired of being married. I’m tired of her. I want to start fresh with just me....

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  • Fatigue is a big destroyer of intimacy. Have a little sympathy and be patient, but also be assertive about what makes a home happy. What you are going through is quite common, but that doesn't make it right. Get that kid a crib and get yourself back in bed to make a little brother or sister. Your wife could easily get turned on!

  • S** will come back, just be patient and be a good dad.

  • Well how many years is in your definition of being patient?

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