What I'm afraid of the most, is what I need.

I'm sixteen and female, I've never been kissed, or asked out (by anyone that wouldn't go to jail for it lol,) I have a medical condition that makes it so I probably won't die of old age, but hey, I'm kickin'. I've had some problems with my mom who is an untreated bi-polar manic depressive, so it's hard at times to get the love I need, but I also know it isn't my fault. I have a huge fear of commitment, and being needed, because I feel that I might die, and leave my loved one behind and heart-broken. I know it seems silly, but it's the way I've thought for the past sixteen years. Although it's what I'm afraid of, I've come to realize, it's what I need the most. I need love, I need to be able to open myself up to someone, but I also know, it isn't going to happen so, simply because: it's not my time.
I know this isn't a confession, more like a confused sixteen-year-old's rant, but, I've needed to get it off my chest for a while, and there wasn't really anyone to listen.

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  • Know that there are people out here who would love to give you the love and attention you deserve. I am a mom to a teen and I may not be the best in the world but I love him with all my heart and you deserve the same hun. Im so sorry it sounds like your life hasnt been the easiest, but remember the saying its better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all. Dont be afraid to open yourself up to love and being loved. I wish you all the best.

  • Best of luck..
    There's always someone who'll listen

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