Funny Confessions

Dying here...

I am LOLing as I am typing this. Too bad you will never, ever get to read this.
I just figured out the reason why I was bombarded with "tangerines".
Every. Single. Day of the Pal's Week.
O. M. G.
This is HILARIOUS.
Thank you.
You just made my day - months later.
Talk about getting the subtle message... (more)

Musings of a Fatty

Every time I'm really hungry I think "This must be what it feels like to be thin."

I like tall "giant" thick girls

I dont know why but i really like tall girls. Im a short small framed dude so tall girls to me are giants. I like to think theyre amazons and i fantasize about them giving me a warm big hug or im sitting on her lap while she feeds me. Or when it goes sexual i daydream that shes sitting on my face. Id like that alot, maybe 1 day.

Gay guy named......

I'm gay for this guy and his name is Rick....I blow him in my head a lot and ** rainbows!!!

Small Steps...

Love hearing your voice.
Love knowing (and hoping) that the awkward days are behind me.
At any point,
this
is
SUCCESS. - small steps...small steps...
Even if I lose face in the process. Hah!
I just wish I could give you the biggest hug EVER and THANK YOU for everything.
I will always remember you as my out-of-this-world, beautiful... (more)

Upstairs bathroom.

My bedroom is right next to the upstairs bathroom. My sister is in there right now with a raging case of diarrhea. It sounds like she is spray painting the inside of the toilet with her **.
I wounder what the guys at school who throw themselves at her would think of the cheerleader with the (more)

Starstruck

Before I continue; I'm 21; he's 23. Both consenting adults..
I had this vision of the perfect man...and I accidentally found him in July. He just happens to be a model and I just happen to be a struggling student...
I reached out to him and started helping him and we're pretty close. He considers us a team and has shared some pretty deep... (more)

I do x job after x job

My x-jobs. = ** for cash!

Hoodie and Cuffs

I saw you. With the hoodie. And the swag. And the cuffs...AND the pop-up collar... So REFRESHING! I heard you when asking "which level?". I saw you when waiting in your car/SUV - just wondering...is she? or isn't she? Newsflash I am. I just am.

Line

It seems that you feel uncomfortable about the idea that somehow, I might.. I just might attempt to... cross the line. Do not worry. That's a BIG, RED line, that I have not intentions to trespass. Just breath, dudette. Just breathe. And keep on...looking on the bright side of things!

Secrets

I'm gay, and was gay throughout a relationship with a girl.While I did accept her asking me out, I only did it out of not wanting to hurt her (a dumb decision i must admit but it was out of friendship).She was an awesome person but I had no feelings of compassion towards her (I just realized this is turning sad but please spare me your... (more)

How i celebrate my birthday and christmas

I celebrate my birthday and Christmas by ** prostitutes, and have been doing so for at least 8 years. They never complain and always satisfy me, best money ever spent.

My Brother is Awesome

I put my five-year-old brother to bed whenever our parents go out, and I always tell him a story. I don't tell him stupid, Disney-esque fairytales though, I try to give him a variety with stories of substance, ya know? So, last night, I told him a condensed version of Lord of the Rings. He was very frustrated, and told me he just couldn't... (more)

**

I say ** because it is taboo and offends minorities.

Scarves!

Who knew? Scarves are where we meet. Thank you for making the effort to reach out. Who knew? :)

Girls: I kicked my ex in the nuts

I dated my ex-boyfriend for about a year. I broke up with him because he cheated on me with 3 other girls and verbally abused me. Anyway, I saw him at a party a while back and he confronted me in a hallway. We were alone and he said we “had to get back together.” I said no so he grabbed my arm and twisted. I broke free and kicked him as hard as I... (more)

My expirence with giveaways

I entered a FIFA 16 giveaway on twitter. I didn't even look at what console it is. Turns out I'm getting FIFA 16 for Xbox one but I have a PS4 lol

I want to have ** with a hermaphrodite

I'm a straight gut but fantasize about having ** with a female looking hermaphrodite who has both a ** and a **. I would lick and ** and pleasure her (more)

Funny Lesbians

I find it funny when lesbians say "we '**' each other".. Hehehe

Stomach fetish

Hii am from India and my age 24yearold boy am from up when I was child i sat on many belly but 10year old I never do this if any women let me sit on her belly (pet) so please contact me it's only fun not other attention please any woman give me my childhood days am rub your belly an also massage your belly but am interested only female my contact... (more)

Stomach Sitting

I love to sit on stomach and also sometimes stand on it. I have done it in my school days a lot and still I do it on my gf.

Sharing my micropenis with the world

I have an infant sized micropenis even though I'm a grown man. I'm straight but love showing it off online mostly to gay and bi buys. I just love the attention. The more I do it the dirtier and cheaper I feel. These guys just get their jollies out of seeing what a freak I am having such a tiny package. I love when younger hung guys mock... (more)

Shhhitty site

Where the fuuck is my confession ???? I've posted it here many times but all i see is confessions of young, dirty biitches who needs to kill themselves.

Lies

I pretend to be on my period to have an excuse for being a nasty **

My huge **

My ** is so huge that when girls ** it they choke on it and pass out from lack of air. The last ** I ** after she passed out I slapped her face with my... (more)

I wish I had a slave

Is it wrong that I wish I had someone to be my slave to do things for me? I get so tired of doing the daily tasks that need to be done along with the chores in my life. I wish I had a slave to cook, clean, do my laundry, wash my car, etc for me.

Doctor Love

I work with a group of People that put in a lot of Hours week in and week out. We spend for time with each other than we do with our own families, not saying that's a good thing at all. So be it Husbands or Wives most of us have arguments with them because of the long hours we have to work. Most of us know who had a fight with their Spouse because... (more)

Am I the only one?

Whenever I have to urinate really badly, I get goosebumps on my **.

Unhelpful In Search for Lost Bikini Top

My family and I (my mother, BFF, sister, brother, and my brother's girlfriend) were vacationing by a lake this summer. We were swimming in an empty part of the lake about 10 miles from the resort and our Mom decided to go get groceries from the nearby town while we were busy. She forgot that our towels and clothes were in the car when she left. We... (more)

You all need serious mental help!!!!

Okay i don't even know how i ended up on this site but here i am and holey S*** you sick little weirdos are letting your dogs eat you out, having S** with your ** siblings, cheating on your partners and god knows what else like this is actually F***** you guys need to get a boyfriend h*** you'd... (more)

Pretending to be a woman in chatrooms

I go into chat rooms (yes they are still out there) and pretend to be a hot woman although I'm really a guy. I make excuses that I don't have a cam. I talk dirty and make the guy ** himself off and **. All the time I'm laughing at how pathetic he is... (more)

I am addicted to chocolate

I have to eat chocolate every day. Even if it is just a little bit like a few chocolate chips. I think it is a real and true addiction because I cannot skip a day.

I ** IN THE PANTS

that one time when i was young (7-9) that my parents and i were at the mall and i was telling them that i had to go to the restroom they said hold it so i did for about 30 minuets. then well they said there buying me pants and what not so you no the ordeal walking around and all but i just had to go…………
so i ran in to a changing room and i just... (more)

Mother-in-law vs daughter in law

I watched my aunt fighting her daughter in law and it was really funny. My aunt is 53yo woman and very impulsive. The daughter in law is 28 and obviously stronger than my aunt. They were wrestling on the floor, until her daughter in law came on top and started slapping my aunt. Wow, I felt like I'm at school, watching some girls fighting. But I... (more)

2 instructors 1 girl

I think 2 of my instructors like me (well that is what several classmates have said). But I know they have a rivalry going between them, and I fantasize when they spar they are fighting over me! One is a complete self centered ** that "hits on me" by talking about other girls, telling me I better... (more)

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