I have been with my boyfriend 3 years, lived together the last 2 years and he has 2 kids under 10 years old. I don't have kids and never wanted any. They are good kids, just wildly hyper and act really immature at times (baby talk, can't do anything for themselves, always need constant adult interaction - can't ever just play by themselves for 15 minutes - literally). We're moving now and in my heart I want us to move to separate places. Im just not a kid person and find raising kids to be draining. Im always super kind and do the right thing and they adore me, but that means they are up my ass constantly. He says if we don't move together then we break up. I've even expressed how hard it's been for me to be around the kids so much. Im career driven and in my 40s. I love this man with all my heart, but is love enough? Or will I resent it if I go along and let us all move in together?
Soccer practice, baseball, cheerleading,... every evening is something else. All things I have zero interest in.
I like my house clean - these kids don't pick up after themselves. I have a busy life and hate picking up after more people. Just everything about life revolving around kids is not me. I have always loved picking up and traveling spontaneously.... can't do that anymore. My finances are no longer my own. How many people regret getting into the step parenting role, especially those who are childfree?
I'm being naive to think this can work, aren't I? I dread waiting til I'm in my later 50s until we're able to do what we want, and that's only if the kids turn out ok. We might be financially drained by then too! I hate that he waited so long to have kids.