Narcissistic little s***! Stepson

I have a stepson that makes living in my own house a living h***. My wife tried to discipline him to stop being disrespectful to me, her, and especially our daughter who is 6 years old. He definitely has narcissistic tendencies. According to his therapist. What I gather from that is that he only cares about his feelings, and needs to be in control of everyone's attention by manipulation, lying, and causing bad behavior in general. His mom tries to discipline him by lecturing him for over an hour wasting her time. He enjoys the lecture because he gets the attention he wants. Even if it's bad attention. He'll argue back once he realizes that the lecture might end just to keep my wife talking and yelling. I have told my wife too many times that he is manipulating her for attention. I stopped telling her because she would somehow blame that the reason he's acting this way is because I'm not the father figure that I'm meant to be. Which, in a way, is true. In the beginning of his mother and I relationship we weren't that close. However, we did talk and get along a lot better then before I moved in with his mom. After that things got really worse day by day. I've been noticing that fights in our house are constantly happening. And, most of the time is because of my stepson. He's a twelve year old that highly, and I mean highly intelligent. He knows how to test things out before executing his deviate plans into action. When things don't go his way I automatically know that he's going to start a fight. When I ignore him he will throw, bang, kick on things until he gets a reaction from anyone in the house. I even think that he gets pure gratification from deliberately making people's lives a living h***. He treats my six year old daughter with disrespect and tries to always get her into trouble. He's actually physically assaulted her for awhile until we found out by accident. Thank God we found out before it got out of hand. He constantly complains to his mom about anything. Small things to. It's so annoying to hear him say "mom" every other minute to ask stupid questions he already knows the answer too!! Waste of time. I don't have full power to discipline him. The most I can do is keep him in his room and take his electronics away from him. He doesn't seem to care when he's punished because he'll say things like "ok", "that's fine", and "doesn't bother me" before he shrugs it off and goes to his room. I tried talking to him. I included him with things that require having fun. I make sure that he's fed, a lot of the times me providing him with what food he likes. Trying to be nice by me trying to make him feel special on certain occasions in his life (birthdays, Christmas, graduation, ECT..) With all of that he shows no appreciation or gratitude for the things I give him. He lies constantly to try to get my daughter and me in trouble. He lies to his real father, and mom about me all the time. His POS dad believes most of the things he says about me and, in turn uses that anger on my wife being disrespectful to her. I hate that f***ing as***le dad of his. He's probably telling his son to do the misbehaving in the first place. His dad is a literal POS. I can go on about him too but, I don't give a single S***about that a**hole. So I won't. Anyway, when I do try to communicate with my stepson he always answers with a lot of disrespect. I've lost patience with him. Now, I find myself snapping at him, glaring at him, and feeling upset when he enters any room I'm in. The communication is bad between him and I and, I just want to leave. But, I won't. Why? Because I am really scared that if I'm not there to keep him in check he'll assault my daughter again. Physically and mentally. So, I stay to protect her. I won't leave, never. I don't care if I'm miserable living with this puke stain this kid is. My daughter is worth every negative s*** I go through in my house. I tried solutions to help our relationship with each other like I've said before. But, it always seems to fail. He's causing problems between my wife and I. I love her and enjoy her company. But, our fights are nearly brought up almost daily because of this little s***! I would love to just smack him on the back of his head like the old days when I was younger. But, I can't. I won't, but I do sometimes fantasize about smacking him unconscious. He's such a pain that he causes other kids to bully him in school. At the times I should be concerned about this situation it comes apparent that I feel really good about him getting what he deserves. I know very well that he's getting his ass whipped because of his self entitled attitude he gives to people when he doesn't get what he wants. Makes me glad that other boys his age won't put up with his crap. Figured that he would learn something from his beatings at school. But, no, he just found ways to get what he wants. I told you. He's highly intelligent and he always test the waters before jumping in. Arrogant little s***! He's in therapy once in a great while. His mom doesn't really take him much. She doesn't believe in psychologist. So, she'll take him when I start b******* about it. She's not consistent at it at all. His mom always tells me that it's my job to set an example. That I have to do ALL the work to get him to like me. Sometimes I nod, and sometimes I'm just fed up with her telling me that. I mean, how does she instantly forget all of the good things I do for her ungrateful POS son. Why doesn't she demand respect from him and constantly let's him back talk and argue with her and me. He doesn't want to improve his behavior. He doesn't want to be a family team player. I just wish that my wife gives full custody to his POS dad. Who, by the way, can't even stand his own son to live with him. His stepmom hates him so much. There was one year my wife agreed to let him go to his dad's house for a year. As soon as his school year ended he was kicked back to my house almost instantly. Like, he sent him back to my house. Causing my summer to be ruined because of this little sh**! His own dad didn't want him with him because of all the trouble he's causing in his house. I'm at my wit's end here. I am depressed, anxious, and dealing with anger issues. I went to therapy because of this and now I'm taking medication for this daily stress. I had to stop drinking alcohol because I was so stressed because of this little as***ole. I want him to leave. I don't care where he goes. I just want him gone away from my house, my family, my daughter, and my life. Never to be seen again by me or anyone else that doesn't like him again. My life would be so much better without him! I know this because when he's away at his dad's house. My wife, daughter, dog, and me are so happy being with each other. My depression goes away. My anxiety goes away and, my anger goes away. Finally feeling happy for that short amount of time. Feels like a black negative cloud of mass leaves and I'm left feeling calm. I guess some of you that is reading this rant might know what I'm talking about. I also guess that some people might make this seem like I'm the a**hole. Well, all I can say is. Think what you want. Don't judge me. Judge yourself. A lot of people know exactly what I am going through. The ones that don't experience this daily issue of mine won't understand. I hope that you never experience what so many other do. If you made it this far reading my rant. I really appreciate the time you took to read my misery. If someone out there is experiencing the same, or close to the same, things that I'm experiencing. I wish you good luck and hope that you find happiness in one way or another. Good Bye.

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  • TL;DR. Got the gist of it though:

    Step families are nothing but drama no matter how you slice it.

    Boo hoo, another "precious" child is going off the rails and turning into just another arrogant POS who needs to die in a ditch.

    When will we get tired of seeing red flags and actually DO SOMETHING about them instead of walking into the punch and then crying forever afterwards?

  • The majority of the mass's from Millennials on down think is all about ME ME ME. If they don't get what they want when they want they start crying about they have anxiety. Lets not forget the over used word and claim PTSD.
    Bunch of whine babies need swift kicks in there arses

  • 1) Punky and I thank you for your comment regarding your determination to remain near your 6 yr old daughter in order to protect her from the insanity and violence of your stepson. This is a sorry scene but you already know that and you're handling the situation like a champ. You're right about people needing to judge themselves before judging you. What you are contending with through the "back-stabbing", psycho triangle that your step son has everyone dancing in is challenging to say the least. Heck, you're a whole lot stronger and resilient than you know son. You're simply incredible! As trying and difficult as things may appear now, you are to be admired a great deal. Hang in there my good man and consider therapy for yourself if you haven't already. She's the future and must be protected by your wisdom and your direction. Now for the stepson... It's a good thing that it's you, your wife and his biological father and not me, because the kid would be given over to the elements and I'm serious about that. I'd make sure that he either learned the hard way to his benefit or he would, sadly and painfully, suffer the consequences for the absolute worst perhaps even to his demise...it would be out of my hands. I'd give it over to the "elements". Whatever happened, happened and I'd already be resigned to it. Now that may sound entirely too ice cold to you but there have got to be serious repercussions for psychotic, violent or narcissistic behavior, always, but especially when they are young and impressionable before their future ends up underground or in a prison cell.

  • 2) As a child, he seems to be "running it" there and that's bad for everyone. He's not being helped any with all of this "bending over" and acquiescing to his manipulative tactics by his mother either. He's got to be put in situations so godawful traumatic and horrific that they "literally" scare the holy sh*t out of him. Something life altering bordering on severe trauma. That can be gotten from a good rigid and strict military type school for boys. If not that, a different cold, rigid and strict Church institution for boys combined with fear and trauma. The type circumstances that forces one to start questioning their behavior and the possible repercussions from that. No more coddling him. If he's old enough to cause this kind of havoc back to back, he's old enough to start getting some life altering lessons. Do it now if you're able because at this point the youngsters future looks pretty bleak...all because of himself and those who are acquiescing to his behavior...allowing him to "run it" when he should be "running around in it". He's being encouraged to be his absolute worst at a very impressionable time in his life. Very bad for him. Keep your chin up and stay strong on your path. You're doing as well as you can under the circumstances. Take care and Good luck. Pam&Punky

  • Is every single g****** child under the age of 18 these days seeing a therapist? And has seriously sociopathic issues?

    Jesus Christ people, stop breeding. We're getting nothing but throwbacks nowadays.

    And if you're a step-to-be... either don't marry the breeder or have the bad seed dispatched. You'd be doing the world a favor. Obviously!!

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