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I am a pirate
Sometimes i feel guilty about it.
Anxious.
I am afraid of life. I am afraid of living. But I am more afraid of dying. But most of all, Im afraid of being like this forever. Generalized Anxiety Disorder affects my life a lot more than people may think. I wish there was a way to break through this.
Lost my faith in life.
Well, first of all, I've always wanted to become a lawyer because I've always believed that it was the most perfect way of justice. This is my first year in law school and I realized that I don't believe in anything that the law states.
Then I made up my mind and knew that I wanted to study Politic Science, but everyone around me says that if... (more)
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Anxious.
I'm a sophomore in college.
I have a 3.0.
I am in the nursing program.
I have a wonderful boyfriend.
I am generous.
I am kind.
I am smart.
I am of average height and weight.
I have dirty blonde hair.
I seem happy; for the most part.
.. well i struggle with anxiety. My therapists think im fine, because i cannot find the words to... (more)
To live or not?
Im only young, so people say "You cant be..." but I am. I wake up each morning and wish I hadent, Ive told my friends after they made me, It made me feel terrible though, like I had hurt them. I wont tell my mum or dad about it becuase they wont belive me at all, or dismiss it instantly. Ive been cutting my self for a long amount of time, Ive... (more)
I'm afraid that I've come all the way to the other side of the world just because I thought it would look cool on facebook. I'm not sure if I even wanted to be here in the first place and I'm afraid that what I really want to do, is go home and get drunk, because I can do that at home but not here. Sometimes I just feel locked up here and I can't... (more)
Random and True on ** and War
Im a white man in my 30s now. One of my earliest memories is seeing my mom naked and I never forgot it. She covered herself just like those pics of Adam and Eve you see. I made out with my sister when we were teenagers. My father and my grandfather sexually molested me as a child. I had no idea what was going on, never dwelled on it growing up... (more)
Today
I am going to commit suicide today.
Sometimes I wish
Sometimes i wish a horrible plague will kill every person on earth so the planet will heal
Overwhelmed by Facebook
I'm not so overwhelmed by Facebook, as I am by the people on there. Either way, here is how it goes. I went into Homeschooling a year or so ago. I did it to get away from the ** teachers, the schedule, and most importantly, the rat race. The popularity (more)
EXCLAIM!
I have a scar on my right cheek, right next to my eye, that looks like an upside-down exclaimation point. I tell everyone I got it when I was straightening my hair, but it's really a scar from when I used to self-harm as a teenager. I'm too embarrassed to tell anyone that I had "that" problem.
It's always you.....always you
I'm afraid that for the rest of my life, the only man I will be able think of is you. When I'm going on dates, getting engaged, having ** with my husband......It'll always be you.
You stupid horrible man!
For the rest of my life, I will think of you every time I have (more)
I was **...
I was ** and everyone thinks I am doing very well. I am being strong on the outside for them when inside it hurts so bad that I can barely breathe. Anyone buying my facade is stupid, it has only been a week and the guy just got out of jail 48 hrs ago!
Please make it all stop
I'm tired from the pain of being a loser.
Secret scars
I carved the Spanish past verb "eras" in to the lower right side of my abdomen. Gods blessings come from his right hand. I carved it with my left hand (cuz I'm left handed, too). Its a reminder of how by my own hand, my blessings were and never will be again.
I am such a ** up!
I am such a ** up!!! I lack discipline in my life. I lack discipline to study and pass exams, I lack discipline to work out, to focus on my goals. I feel like my life has no direction at all. I have some values and ideas that are important to me, but I don't see what can I do to hold on to them. I... (more)
I !@#$!@#$ Need
A miracle. Enuf.
Alone
I have no family. I have no to take care of me if I am hurt or sick. I have nothing. No one. My husband cheated on me and I had to leave him. It wasn't just once and it wasn't just physical. What bothered me most was that he betrayed me by belittling me to others. But now I have nothing. I'm attractive, all that's there for me are people who want... (more)
The Horrible Truth
I thought that if I just worked really hard and put my all into everything I did, I would eventually make my way to where I wanted to be in life.
The horrible truth I now realize is that sometimes, apparently for some people's situations, giving your best is not good enough.
I did try. With everything I had, in every situation. No matter... (more)
Sometimes
I want to commit suicide so bad.
My anger has reached it's level and my depression is down in the dumps. I hate myself and I just want to die. I'm so close to killing myself because I have nobody to talk to even though I see so many counselors. Obviously none of them help, though.
I've been in a mental hospital 3 times. That hasn't helped... (more)
No one even has a clue..
I live a double life. My friends and family always see me smile with out a worry about life. I pretend all is okay and they don't even have a clue... I lost my job a month ago and they think I have a savings which I've been using to pay my bills. They have no clue I've been sleeping with a man for money. My smiles are fake.. My life is fake.. All... (more)
Lame
I'm not good enough for anyone, because I don't feel like I am.
It's a catch 22.
Everything scares me, because anything exciting comes with a risk... risk scares me... everything scares me.
I'm afraid of swimming, afraid of heights, afraid of flying, afraid of being alone, afraid of... everything.
The only thing I'm suited for is being... (more)
Jus a few thoughts
He is a huge **!!! i really dont like him
This works fine
Ive started to starve myself and throwing up if I do eat, I'm not bulimic or anorexic because I am actually really over weight and so far it's done wonders. my mum tells me how I need to lose weight or how I always look like I'm gaining weight when I work out and diet, yet when she hears me purging or not eating she gets angry and upset.
I... (more)
This defines me
The song "Radio" by Alkaline Trio pretty much sums up my entire life at 27. Broken Angry Spiteful Never give people a chance to let you down.
I want to die.
I want to die.
More than anything. I feel worthless and a complete ** to everyone I meet.
I have a boyfriend. His name is Marvin. I love him. He's been there for me, and I think he's the only one there for me anymore. He's absolutely amazing but he can't be there for me all the time, and I... (more)
I hate you.
I confess everything is down the **.
yesterday was peachy. today is **.
I made a fool of myself to see a boy who wasnt there.
and in the process, i saw someone who used to be really 'close' to me with another someone... and im pretty sure that... (more)
Lost
I just realized this morning that I am not a good person. I feel that my core is rotten. I've been lying, cheating and stealing since a very young age. I am greedy and egotistical. I am not happy with my life. I don't want to change though.
I love wine, **, travel. I am married to my third husband... (more)
I hate myself
It seems like I have everything going for me. But I hate myself because I'm not skinny. It's superficial and stupid, but it's true. I wish I had the self control to be anorexic, like I used to be.
You knew...
You definetely knew, Al. Seven freakin' years... I bet you still know, Alvin. I bet you still do.
I'm losing it.
Last night I got drunk for the first time ever. Why? I'm not even sure. I think I'm just tired; I'm seventeen but I feel like I'm fifty.
I regret drinking. It's against my beliefs and I'm perfectly ashamed of myself. But I needed a break from everything, you know? Every day is the same dream, nothing ever changes. Except when things get worse.
I... (more)
My profession
For 10 years I have been working for my local branch of the FBI. I have not been able to tell anyone but my family and I'm tired of keeping it secret. I only have to keep it quiet due too the area in which I am working, but don't get me wrong, I love my job. Guess you could say I moonlight as a stay at home mom from Johnson County Missouri.
*Sigh*
I feel like life simply just isn't worth it. Look at the world, and then theres tiny little me. So much stuff going on around me. So many people that think they've got it hard when they have no idea.
"Daddy wont give me pocket money"
"Mummy wont pay for my hairspray"
Get real. I know there are plenty of people out there worse than me, but these... (more)
Hate...Love...
I hate it when peeple are always being put down. I hate it when people are so depressed I mean there has to be someone out there you can talk to. If not I'll listen just comment. I hate it when I can't tell my crush I'm into him. like yesterday was the day i was going to do it but i got scared and chickend out. I hate it when my friends are... (more)
I can't shake you off of...
My head. That's why I look like Medusa. I love you, Alvin. I always, always, always, will. No matter how many lifetimes I get to live. BTW, this is not a love confession, but something close to it, though. ;)