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Funny Confessions
My Delusional Cousin
My cousin thinks she is a mermaid. She is 22 years old, and will tell you right to your face that she has been a mermaid since she was 11 years old, when she used a youtube spell to turn herself into one. She constantly wears a pearl necklace because that's where all her mermaid power is stored, and if it breaks, she will fall ill or possibly die... (more)
Whos' Your Daddy?
I'm probably your father. I use to ** your momma when her husband went to work each morning. He left out the front door and I came in the back door. Your momma made me good meals like fried chicken and chicken fried steak. Then she led me up stairs and I (more)
Stuffing **
I read a lot about men that like to stiff women **. My question to women do you ever stiff men’s underwear
Trending Posts
I was in the passenger seat and my loving boyfriend was driving and I said I wish there was more head room in this truck, you know more...
My ex wife said if you really want to try sucking a ** i can get you a man in 30 minutes. If you don't like it you can stop. I said yes...
I badly want to be r*pe. I can't stop thinking about it. I get turned on when I'm being m*lstd in PUVs. I ** to how they feel me as...
I have been sleeping with a man’s wife for two years abb my d she is in love with me. I use her in every way possible and she loves being...
For a guy like me when someone sees you and thanks you its America. I wanted so bad to go to summer camp with the other girls but no I...
ED the warehouse man
There once was a warehouse man named ED. Who use to eat anything he was feed. He sat on a shelf as he ate himself and his a** h*** went to his head !!!! Wasn't that GRAND!!
Setting records part two.
Well...Here is part two as promised.
As I said I work in the oil patch and I end up traveling around a lot, I do ok with the girls and usually end up finding some trashy tramp to take home any time I go looking for one, I went to a small town and grabbed a hotel room, About an hour from where we were working but it was the closest place and I... (more)
Setting records part one.
20ish years ago I had an experience I would never have guessed I would be able to say was number 2 on my list of top encounters and last weekend I topped it, I'll start with that one and go from there, By the way I don't care if you think this is bull or not, It happened so eat your hearts out.
When I was 20 I was working up in northern Canada in... (more)
Girls kicking boys in the **
I love getting dominated by girls. Any girls love kicking boys in the **? Why?
Mother took me to Victoria's Secret.
Mom caught me in her expensive lingerie one day. She wasn't really too angry it's just that I was too large for her things. Also I left my ** in her French undies. She saved some cash for my back to school clothes but insisted we go "girl shopping". Mom had me change my underwear and replace it with a... (more)
Sexual behavior
I really like getting kicked in the ** by girls that are dominate it turns me on. Any girls confess they are into this as well. Some girls told me they think its funny cause how much pain we are in that why you girls laugh at us. And that also cause how we scream and grab ourselves and fall to the... (more)
Kicking **
I have been interested into getting girls that doing CBT. How many of you girls are trying to find boys that are into it? Does it turn you on?
Is it just me?
I don't know about any of you lot, but do you ever see a woman first thing in the morning,be it driving to work or in a shop/petrol station, and wonder how everything is down there?
Like, what kind of knickers she's wearing,or most importantly for my imagination, whether she has showered that morning before leaving,or is her pu$$y still hot and... (more)
Looks like a fun night
I went out with friends the other night and my wife had a hot tub party with some girlfriends to celebrate a certain something, Anyway I get home at 2:00am and there is ** everywhere, Clothes and girls and food and booze, Her older sister is passed out sitting up on the couch, Wrapped in a towel... (more)
Fetish posters are so needy! LOL
Here's a fun trick I recently discovered. Troll a newer post from one of the resident one-trick ponies around here (by "troll" I mean "leave a comment expressing the contempt they deserve"). An almost identical new post will appear within a week. Yes, they really are that immature, and need attention that badly! It's hilarious in a sick way.
Sexual behavior
Why do you girls think its funny to kick a boy in the **?
Pier 60,Clearwater beach,Florida
Last year I was at Clearwater beach,Fla, and was having a great time,weather was gorgeous and the women were out in their bikinis,
Anyway, I needed a **.
I went to the toilets on the beach at pier 60,found a stall, went in and did my business.
This is where it went wrong. After hearing about a nsfw... (more)
Tiny Italian girl
Broke up with my long time girlfriend 6 months ago and moved into a basement apartment near Bristol, Pa., its in the rear of a private house. Its small and old fashioned but affordable for me. They built a half assed wall that blocks off their laundry room from my apartment. It seems to be a single layer of paneling with no insulation and I can... (more)
Bet she wishes she stayed home.
Last Saturday night some friends and I were hanging out drinking, Another friend showed up around 12:30 with a girl he had picked up at the bar, At first we were all like WTF??? She was not his normal skinny, blonde, flat chested girl that you usually see him with, He usually picks up pretty hot girls but they are all very similar looking. She is... (more)
Billet moms
I play junior hockey and if you know anything about it when you get drafted to a junior team from a different town you end up with what's called a billet family, Usually a family who is involved in hockey to one level or another but sometimes not, I had heard stories from my brother who played until the idiot got drunk and crashed his dirtbike... (more)
Hate to admit it but
This is the first time im really admitting this but relationships are ** EXHAUSTING man! This is the first time in my life I have no one to love but friends and family and i dont have to shave my pubbbeeesss or respond to texxxtttsss or spend my mmooonneeeyyy or hear the BLAH BLAH BLAH. Like all... (more)
The first to be sacrificed
(I saw a post like this that was quite disappointing because it was serious while expected to be funny. So now I'll try! And presumably fail.)
1.) People who actually toast their Pop-Tarts.
2.) The kids who would walk down hallways in school and just turn the dial in EVERY SINGLE ONE.
3.) Marshmallow thiefs. You know those people who take... (more)
Feels good doesn't it
I've literally just let out a ** that lasted 10seconds plus👍 I just kept on pushing even tho I knew it may be risky and it kept on coming 😁 Sadly I was alone in this moment of joy.
I еnjоу сlаssiсаl mчsiс
The funny thing is this...before I listened to classical music I was and still am a fan of Type O Negative it's true.
Licking workers food
That I lick peoples food in the fridges at work.
Mainly the females.
I rub the tip of my ** with my fingers then handle their drinks bottles.
And once I went in the toilet after Claire had been in there,I was waiting outside and I heard the tampon bin shut before she flushed and washed her... (more)
I broke my boyfriend's nose with my prosthetic mask!
I broke my boyfriend's nose by smashing my "face" into his to try and kiss him. I have a prosthetic mask made from plaster, that I'm meant to wear in public, but I just were it all the time I don't even take it off toe eat or drink, I just lift it and shove the food under and into my mouth. Because of all the lovey-dovey endorphins rushing through... (more)
I had a comment reported on another site.
I was looking at my comments and I noticed that they have been reported. It's not a total mystery because I think I know who would've had my comments reported. Because when I noticed that there was the report icon closer to where it says reply. I know why somebody would've reported my comments. It's because somebody may have been angry about me... (more)
Hi, timid CP mods
I wonder why you'll let through confession after confession about ** and killing animals for fun and people claiming they're shtupping their sisters or moms, but you won't let genuine posts see the light of day. Are you frightened of people who actually have something real to say? I think you... (more)
Someone's Been Eating My Sandwiches
And it ain't ** Goldie Locks. I work at a machine shop and I work nights. So I make a big zip lock bag of sandwiches to eat over several days and keep them in our lunchroom fridge. This past week I went to market and got expensive honey ham, and New York style deli cheese with a wonderful spicy... (more)
I like ** with people
I like ** with people at my job, I walk around and poke holes in things with a thumbtack, sometimes I move the paperwork around and it makes people fustrated, I steal all the pens then sell them there’s a girl at my job she hates me and she’s said she’s gonna get her father to kill me,
My dad scammed my sister and I out of our allowances
I should begin by saying our dad is really good at sleight of hand magic tricks and stuff like that. That's how he was able to pull this off.
Yesterday, my sister and I were having fun racing each other from one side of our rather large backyard to the other. We were catching our breath between races when our dad said something and made us... (more)
Pranking strangers
I used to go up to random kids in my school and tell them that John was looking for them. Everyone knows someone named John, and they always fell for it.
It happened one night
My girlfriend and I got drunk with my buddy one evening as the night went on she asked me if she could kiss him which eventually led to him rubbing her ** then ** her ** which then led to all 3 of us... (more)
My friend and I spent a weekend stuck together
Back during summer break, I [F/15] went away with a friend [F/15] and her family to their weekend home. It's out by this beautiful lake in this small, middle-of-nowhere type town.
We arrived on a Friday around noon. The first few hours were uneventful. Me, her, and her little brother fished for awhile before heading inside. Then her brother... (more)
Is it because I lied when I was seventeen?
I can't sleep tonight
Everybody's saying everything is alright
Still I can't close my eyes
I'm seeing a tunnel at the end of all of these lights
Sunny days, where have you gone?
I get the strangest feeling you belong
Why does it always rain on me?
Is it because I lied when I was seventeen?
Why does it always rain on me?
Even when the sun... (more)
Cutting my **
When I was about 13 I cut all my ** off with a pair of school scissors and sprinkled them all over the toilet seats at school just to watch everyone's disgust and dismay LOL it was funny, everyone was going nuts and speculating who done it but no one ever thought I'd do something like that...and that... (more)
Exposing SIL.
On New years my SIL stayed at our place and had crashed on the couch, She is late 20's and has an average body but huge **, They are big and soft with big **, I got up and found her on the couch in a muscle shirt and one of her huge